Colors of Remnant

1. Are you 18 or older? We want to know if anyone is under 18 years of age. Being under 18 will not bar you from participating in our community. Rather, this will allow us to gauge who is acting inappropriately toward minors.

-I am above 18 years of age. (and always double check to make sure to keep my comments tailored to age-appropriate crowd)

2. Do you have past experience with collaborative writing or roleplay, and if so, roughly how much? You can be brief. This is intended to help us provide useful feedback in your approval.

- I started roleplaying when I was probably between eight and ten or so, with a 2nd edition D&D Ravenloft campaign, though I had been writing creatively for years before that.

3. You may include an optional (SHORT!) Roleplay sample for people to read that gives a feel for your character in writing.


"Did you know that people in Atlas can fly?" Vert didn't even bat an eye as she'd said the comment to the naive listener. "How? They've got Gravity Dust Crystals stuck so far in themselves that they just start floating away. Trust me, I grew up in Atlas, I know from first-hand experience!"

Vert Yule seems to be very interested in all kinds of media, like games and shows, so I’d like to hear more about how she came to like them in her backstory and how it influenced her. It might be a minor aspect, but I think there’s potential to expand on her personality with that. You said she likes to imitate moves done by game/comic book characters, so maybe think of detailing her fighting style with that in mind. Just some ideas for you if you want them.

I got the sense that Vert lived in a strict household what with her parents concerned with their child upholding their legacy and for the good of Atlas, her upbringing might have reflected the militaristic lifestyle of the kingdom to prepare her for that. She might have been restricted in a lot of ways and could have grown up without the chance to be a kid. Her grandmother taking Vert under her care might be how she finally got that chance and grew attached to media. This is just me making inferences and giving stuff significance, so ignore this if it isn’t what you’re going for with your character.

There could be some kind of general Aura investment for Vert Yule’s projections, something that can give us a sense of how much for what kind of output she gets using Manifestation. Does a projection sustain itself once she creates it or is there a constant drain? Something to consider.

For Previous Education, I think it will be worth mention how Vert Yule was brought up by tutors before formally entering into Atlas Academy. Her training under her grandmother should also be included.

Besides that, I’ve no problem giving my approval for her. So far, so good!

I'd have really liked a more detailed description of her weapon and fighting style, does she use every kind of Dust regularly? I suppose she doesn't need hardlight thanks to her Semblance. Seeing as it can make solid constructs that can also be flexible (e.g. a whip) there's a lot of potential with it.

Also, I think it could be nice to describe a bit how she behaves with others (since it's the site's main thing). We know her personality and I get the feeling that she wouldn't adapt her character to social context... but is she a loner, does she like company, or perhaps she only bonds with people who have similar interests? I can't really tell right now.

I like the profile otherwise, we always need more sarcasm.

Ooooooooh, another sarcastic ass? Sign me the hell up!

'Yes' yes yes.

(I would like to echo Sheid and Myron's comments on personality, backstory, and fighting style, though: a little more elbow grease in the sections about her fascination with media and how that translates to savoir-faire would be helpful.)